An Ode to my Girlfriends

I awoke this morning with devout thanksgiving for my friends, the old and new. - Ralph Waldo Emerson


I haven't posted in almost a week (bad Mommy blogger!), but I've been busy being awesome with even more awesome women. I spent the last week gearing up for and running Ragnar Del Sol (http://www.ragnarrelay.com/race/delsol), which is a relay team event that runs 202 total miles over 2 days. Our team of thirteen amazing ladies was split between two vans, and each runner ran 3 legs varying from 2.5 miles to 13.5 miles (not it!). The vans leapfrogged one another after every six legs, so each van had a few hours of downtime to sleep, shower, eat, and question our sanity. When our team crossed the finish line Saturday evening - 37 hours after we started - I had slept a total of 6 hours, ran about 11.5 total miles, and survived on a steady diet of Gatorade, beef jerky, peanut butter pretzels, and M&Ms. We would probably tell you we survived two days of hell together, but hell might have had better scenery, fewer hills, and smell a little better.

And I actually loved it.

I loved it for a couple of reasons. One, I love challenging myself physically. I'm competitive, mainly with myself, and I love the satisfaction of finishing something that common sense (and my mother) says you're crazy to try. I actually like the feeling of my muscles aching - it means I DID something. (I completely accept that I'm a masochistic freak. One of these days, I'll tackle that in therapy.)

But the bigger reason I enjoyed the weekend so much was because of the time I spent with my girlfriends. Of my 12 teammates, only 3 of them are new friends. With the others, I've run a half marathon through the hills of San Francisco, run a full marathon through the streets of San Diego, walked 60 miles to fund breast cancer research and programs in Chicago and Phoenix, and spent countless hours sharing wine, beer, and conversation. I have no doubt that I'll share more future adventures with both the new and existing friends.

I spent the most time with my five vanmates, only one of which is a "new" friend. We all have motherhood in common, we all have spouses or significant others, and we all work. I'm sure we had a ton of differences too, but I couldn't easily tell you what they were. We spent more time talking about shared experiences and empathizing over one another's stories than stressing out over what we didn't have in common. One of my friends is a mother to two kids who are also ADHD - her gentle support over a phone call I shared with my husband about Sam's meds was what I needed in order to feel good that I was handling things in the best way possible for my son. Our van ride wasn't a total chick flick though - we spent just as much time talking about poop, farts, and body odor as we did about home life, work, and kids. Think of it as Boys on the Side meets Bridesmaids meets Chariots of Fire.

I consider myself extremely lucky to have a wide and diverse network of girlfriends. For every friend I ran with this weekend, I probably have two more who couldn't care less about arch support and stride length, but who are just as important to me. My truest and best friends are loyal, principled, and emotionally healthy (eh, relatively so, anyway. Birds of a feather, and all that.). No Drama Llamas allowed. My friends and I have similar sensibilities, none of us take ourselves too seriously, and all of us have what I consider to be a healthy sense of humor. Whenever I spend time with any of my girlfriends, I'm inspired, energized, and thankful for the gift of their friendship. My friends are my sounding board, my dose of reality, my shoulders to cry on, and my advice givers. I endeavor to be the kind of friend for them that they are for me.
I live for my kids and love and adore my husband. But were it not for my girlfriends, I'm convinced I wouldn't have my sanity. I hold these true friendships sacred. I can go for months without speaking to some of my oldest and dearest girlfriends, but we always seem to pick up right where we left off. I honestly feel sorry for people who don't have these kinds of dear friends. I truly don't know what I would do without them.

If the making of real friends is the measure of true success in life, I've won the lottery.